Introduction To Series: The Unveiling of God

Facing My Unbelief

One random weekday while going through my usual busy routine, I found myself having an extended conversation with the Lord. My heart was heavy about several things that were going on in my world. I was filled with peace talking to God as the heavy thoughts popped up at random times during my day.

Years of living in a genuine relationship with God have made praying feel like a comfortable conversation with an intimate friend, I found certain aspects of the conversation to be more difficult than others that day, namely, a quickly approaching financial deadline. A deadline where I had absolutely no idea where the money would come from.

That day, whenever those thoughts about finances came up, I avoided or dismissed them instead of bringing them to God in prayer and letting Him bring me to peace as I had with the other things weighing on my heart that day. I didn’t put much thought into avoiding the topic of finances. I suppose mostly because it was not something I ever really prayed about (definitely not from a lack of financial problems over the years). Until that day, if I were to be completely honest, I never noticed that I seldom prayed about my finances. 

That evening, as I was wrapping up my day with a cup of tea and a moment of quiet, a thought crossed my mind. Over the next few months, that thought would send me on an incredible journey with the Lord. The thought came in the form of a seemingly simple question: “Why was I having trouble talking to God about my financial needs?”

I attempted to find an answer to this question by considering several things: my past and how my family often struggled with finances; the fact that money wasn’t really that important to me; and even the fact that I usually felt I could find a solution to financial problems on my own. Although these were all plausible answers to the question at hand, none of them satisfied me. 

As I continued to reflect on this, the Holy Spirit provided the answer I was looking for. I had trouble talking to God about my financial needs because I didn’t see Him as a truly generous God. Despite having all my needs consistently met throughout my life, somehow, somewhere I had believed a lie. Because finances were always a struggle for me, I assumed that God must not be as generous as the Bible describes Him to be. As someone who has spent much time leading and teaching others in the Christian faith, it was shocking for me to come face to face with my own unbelief. 

While painful to realize that I had so completely bought into a lie, the realization brought so much freedom to my soul and depth to my prayer life. 

How I viewed God directly affected what I spoke with Him about. 

This simple revelation caused me to question how my prayers were being affected by what I believed about who God is. Were there other aspects of God’s character that I misunderstood or doubted? I was overwhelmed to discover that what I actually believed about God (and not necessarily what I thought I should believe) could be revealed in the content of my prayers. It became a practical way for me to check my heart and how it aligned with scripture.

I do not pretend to have figured it all out. I have much to learn about the correlation between my true beliefs about God and how I talk to Him. There is even more for me to learn about the various aspects of God’s character revealed in Scripture. I will say, however, that this revelation about how our view of God directly ties to how we talk to Him has revolutionized my prayer life. I firmly believe that it can revolutionize yours as well. 

I invite you to come with me and dive into some of the lessons I have learned along the way as the Lord has addressed the unbelief I have unknowingly carried. Each blog in this series will examine an aspect of God’s character, and how understanding it affects our prayers. There will be simple action steps and prayer prompts to encourage you along the way.  

Please share your comments.  I look forward to getting to know you as we go on this journey together!